I have spent my whole life painting. But today at the age of 39 when I look back I often wonder how life would have been different had i let my passion of painting slip and took some responsibilities in life. But I guess I will never know the answer to it. My approach for painting has been simple. I love drawing people, places, shades and sometimes sceneries that touch my heart. And I got a lot of applause from a vast majority of people, the people who don’t understand art. But the great pundits of art never liked my works. They said all of my works are too “amateurish.” Throughout my youth and younger days, I tried to impress them. Tried to read books on what they call modern arts and also worked on that. But to be honest I never got any satisfaction from it. So I decided to do what I get pleasure from, in their words, “amateurish paintings”. But I never got the fame which I wanted, the passion soon became my occupation and I started painting for survival. Painting for some random news papers and magazines once in a while, that’s what I have been doing for the past 15 years or so.
But suddenly one day my world turned upside down. The day started almost like a monotonous Sunday. I got up late and then collected the newspaper and sat down in the sofa and was going through the headlines when my phone made a buzz. “Hello?” “Samar?” “Yes, speaking” I said.
“It’s me, Rajiv!”
Rajiv was one of my closest buddies during college days. And probably my only critic of painting who whole heartedly applauded and criticized my works without being bias. I tried to remember when exactly I had lost contact with him, but I couldn’t remember. He, like most of my friends went on to be successful in life. He said that he was now working with Times of India and had been recently transferred to Kolkata. What he said next was quite interesting. He said that times of india were sponsoring to an event of academy of fine arts, where they have asked for open participation from all. That means everyone can send their painting and the selected few will be displayed in the exhibition and the one which will get maximum votes from the panel will get a prize money worth a few lakhs. Initially I was a bit pessimistic as I remembered all those exhibitions of academy where i had sent my works, but none were ever selected. So obviously I had no chance of making it anyway, but Rajiv insisted that I am no longer a youth without any experience I had been painting for several magazines so I had the experience required to make it work. Although I didn’t believe that experience will help, but since I had no work in hand i decided to give it a try.
It was a place which I had seen in my dreams many a times. Sun going down in the west making the surroundings mysterious and with the darker shadows of the mountains it looked even more mystic. The river flowing by gave the place an almost heavenly beauty. I painted day and night for the next few weeks and finally when it was done, I was more than satisfied. I had decided to show it to Rajiv before sending it to the academy but then realised that it was the last day of submission so I packed the painting properly and submitted in the proper place.
Later that night I received an email from academy confirming my submission. I saw another mail had come from Times of india domain, signed by Rajiv, a week ago. It read Samar, I tried you on phone but perhaps you are busy and not answering to it. Anyway that day i forgot to mention that the theme for the exhibition is “modern art and beyond” other entries will not be nominated. Rajiv I felt a drop of sweat ran down from my head as it throbbed. All the work went in vain. I cursed myself for my carelessness. Carelessness is a disease, which I have ever since I was born, I believe. I felt frustrated with myself for not checking the mail in time. Perhaps it was one of the ways of life to say that I am nothing more than a loser and I will always be. A bottle of whiskey seemed to be the only pain killer for me at the moment.
The next day I decided to clean my room. But I was too lazy for that. I asked my maid to clean it up properly. After sometime, she called me from my room.
A few weeks later
I received a mail from academy: Samar, We are proud to declare that your painting has been selected for the exhibition at fine arts, powered by Times of India. Further, we feel it’s a privilege to tell you that your painting received the maximum number of votes and is the winner of the competition. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Could this be true? Was it that simple? The answer was right in front of my eyes and I kept searching for it forever? The next day after the press conference where the media threw at me lots of questions and most of which i decided to dodge, i finally got the opportunity to see my painting. The one that had won me my award for best painting. It was hard to believe my eyes but it was true, the red shade of the sun, the blue waves of the water the darker shades of the mountains all were there, but not in the manner I had initially wanted it to be. I felt the hairs behind my neck were standing. I smiled. That’s my masterpiece, i thought.
A few days ago
Next day I decided to clean my room. But I was too lazy for that. I asked my maid to clean it up properly. After sometime, she called me from my room. I went inside to enquire what was bothering her, but seeing what she had in her hands my jaws dropped. She held the painting which i had made for the exhibition. I realised yesterday was the last day and i had sent some wrong painting. After looking here and there I came to the conclusion that I carelessly packed the rough paper where i had been testing my colours for this painting. I had submitted a sheet with random colours on it. I tore the original painting and sat down on the ground. Carelessness!!
But suddenly one day my world turned upside down. The day started almost like a monotonous Sunday. I got up late and then collected the newspaper and sat down in the sofa and was going through the headlines when my phone made a buzz. “Hello?” “Samar?” “Yes, speaking” I said.
“It’s me, Rajiv!”
Rajiv was one of my closest buddies during college days. And probably my only critic of painting who whole heartedly applauded and criticized my works without being bias. I tried to remember when exactly I had lost contact with him, but I couldn’t remember. He, like most of my friends went on to be successful in life. He said that he was now working with Times of India and had been recently transferred to Kolkata. What he said next was quite interesting. He said that times of india were sponsoring to an event of academy of fine arts, where they have asked for open participation from all. That means everyone can send their painting and the selected few will be displayed in the exhibition and the one which will get maximum votes from the panel will get a prize money worth a few lakhs. Initially I was a bit pessimistic as I remembered all those exhibitions of academy where i had sent my works, but none were ever selected. So obviously I had no chance of making it anyway, but Rajiv insisted that I am no longer a youth without any experience I had been painting for several magazines so I had the experience required to make it work. Although I didn’t believe that experience will help, but since I had no work in hand i decided to give it a try.
It was a place which I had seen in my dreams many a times. Sun going down in the west making the surroundings mysterious and with the darker shadows of the mountains it looked even more mystic. The river flowing by gave the place an almost heavenly beauty. I painted day and night for the next few weeks and finally when it was done, I was more than satisfied. I had decided to show it to Rajiv before sending it to the academy but then realised that it was the last day of submission so I packed the painting properly and submitted in the proper place.
Later that night I received an email from academy confirming my submission. I saw another mail had come from Times of india domain, signed by Rajiv, a week ago. It read Samar, I tried you on phone but perhaps you are busy and not answering to it. Anyway that day i forgot to mention that the theme for the exhibition is “modern art and beyond” other entries will not be nominated. Rajiv I felt a drop of sweat ran down from my head as it throbbed. All the work went in vain. I cursed myself for my carelessness. Carelessness is a disease, which I have ever since I was born, I believe. I felt frustrated with myself for not checking the mail in time. Perhaps it was one of the ways of life to say that I am nothing more than a loser and I will always be. A bottle of whiskey seemed to be the only pain killer for me at the moment.
The next day I decided to clean my room. But I was too lazy for that. I asked my maid to clean it up properly. After sometime, she called me from my room.
A few weeks later
I received a mail from academy: Samar, We are proud to declare that your painting has been selected for the exhibition at fine arts, powered by Times of India. Further, we feel it’s a privilege to tell you that your painting received the maximum number of votes and is the winner of the competition. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Could this be true? Was it that simple? The answer was right in front of my eyes and I kept searching for it forever? The next day after the press conference where the media threw at me lots of questions and most of which i decided to dodge, i finally got the opportunity to see my painting. The one that had won me my award for best painting. It was hard to believe my eyes but it was true, the red shade of the sun, the blue waves of the water the darker shades of the mountains all were there, but not in the manner I had initially wanted it to be. I felt the hairs behind my neck were standing. I smiled. That’s my masterpiece, i thought.
A few days ago
Next day I decided to clean my room. But I was too lazy for that. I asked my maid to clean it up properly. After sometime, she called me from my room. I went inside to enquire what was bothering her, but seeing what she had in her hands my jaws dropped. She held the painting which i had made for the exhibition. I realised yesterday was the last day and i had sent some wrong painting. After looking here and there I came to the conclusion that I carelessly packed the rough paper where i had been testing my colours for this painting. I had submitted a sheet with random colours on it. I tore the original painting and sat down on the ground. Carelessness!!
